Текст песни: Pachelbel Rant + перевод

But I’ll sing the melody right now

Ba da da da da da da, da da da da da da da da da da da da da

Yeah, Pachelbel’s Canon in D

It was a big hit in the classical world and I know this because I’m a geek

I know what you’re thinking

«Rob, you can’t be a geek, you play guitar, you’re so cool!»

Okay, you weren’t thinking that, but I was

Well, I haven’t always been this cool because I haven’t always played guitar

I started out on the cello

Yeah, the cello is a wonderful, beautiful instrument

It’s cool to be an adult that plays the cello

Being a kid that played the cello sucked

Because there’s no way to be cool when your instrument is larger than you

When you walk to school with a cello you’re like a wounded gazelle on the

Serengeti, man

The bullies just smell you comin' from a mile away

«Ooh, I don’t know what that thing is, but I know I’m going to break it!»

But I put up with all of the abuse because I loved the music that we played

I loved everything we played in orchestra except this

I hate Pachelbel’s Canon in D with a passion

I hate it so much because the cello part

Is the worst cello part ever written in the history of cello parts

It’s eight quarter notes that we repeated over and over again, they are as

follows

And that’s all we got to play

We repeated those eight notes 54 times, I counted

Because I had nothing else to do

I would sit back and listen to the violins get lovely melodies

The violas would get lovely melodies, the second violins would get lovely

melodies

Which should just not happen

And the cello, we got stuck with eight crappy, lousy, stinkin' notes

And I began to wonder, why?

Why would Pachelbel do that to us, such a beautiful instrument?

And my theory was, he once dated a cellist

And she dissed him really bad

So for the rest of his life he came up with the worst cello parts he could ever

think of

It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t hear him every day

I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking «Rob, don’t listen to classical

radio anymore!»

I… it doesn’t matter

Pachelbel’s following me

It sounds paranoid but he’s following you too, you hear him every day

I don’t know, I went to my step-nephew in law’s eighth grade graduation

And their graduation song was a song by Vitamin C, no

«As we go on, we’ll remember»

La da da da da da da da da da da

So on the drive home I turned on some classic rock, some Aerosmith

«There was a time when I was so broken-hearted»

La da da da da da da da da da da

So I got home, I thought I’d clear my mind with some folk music, no

«Listen children to my story, it was written long ago»

A ba da da da da da da da da da da da da da

They do Pachelbel just like everybody does Pachelbel, just to torment me

I don’t even go to Taco Bell anymore, because it sounds too close

I hate Pachelbel with a passion and I don’t even know his first name

It’s probably Johann, they’re all named Johann

When you think about it, he’s the original one-hit wonder

He had one hit 300 years ago, it’s my cross to bear my entire life

Where are they now, that’s what I want to know, where are you now, Pachelbel?

VH1's I Love the 1790s! Where is it?

And if he would just stay away from music that I loved it would be better

But he won’t, he is shameless, he will follow me to the ends of the earth

I went to H.O.R.D.E. Festival thinking

«No, he couldn’t possibly follow me to the H.O.R.D.E. Festival»

But you know who was at the H.O.R.D.E. Festival? Blues Traveler!

So that means that Pachelbel was also at the H.O.R.D.E. Festival

«Suck it in, suck it in, suck it in where you’re Anne Boleyn or Rin Tin Tin

Make a desperate move and then you’re in»

A da da da da da da da da da da da da da da

So I figure I’m gonna listen to punk rock for the rest of my life

No dice

«Do you have the time to listen to me whine?»

A-ba da da da da da da da da da da

Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da

You know, I’m getting really bored

'Cause all songs have the same damn chords

Punk music is a joke, it’s really just baroque

Am I just paranoid?

A na na, na na, na na, na na, na na, na na

«I want to push you around, well I will I will

I want to push you down, well I will I»

«Whoa-ho, it’s been good living with you»

«In my machinehead, is better than the rest, my machinehead is better than the»

«See the stone set in her eye, see the thorn twist in her»

«I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel

I’m cold and I am shamed, lying naked on the floor»

«He was a boy, she was a girl, could it be any more obvious?»

«We're not gonna take it, no, we ain’t gonna take it»

«On your mark get set and go now, got a dream and we just know now»

«No woman, no cry»

When I find myself in times of trouble, Pachelbel’s always following me

I’ll see you in hell, Pachelbel

Oh, Pachelbel, Pachelbel, I’ll see your ass in hell

I’ll see you in hell, Pachelbel

Thank you so much Penn State!

Enjoy the rest of the show, thanks